Monday, July 6, 2009

Soon enough

Sorry for the lack of updates.

I have an excuse. Or, a number of excuses. I have been in one of those very assessment and exam oriented time periods at school. You know the kind - they happen just before each set of holidays. I'm in the second day of my last week for the term, and then have two weeks holidays before I'm supposed to go into super serious mode, and be a proper year 12 HSC student. But here I am right now stressing that I have a major assessment task for IPT due this Friday (which I was working on, but shoved it off, to write this), and several essays to write for English, and one essay (due tomorrow!! ahhh!) for Visual Arts, which, might I add, I didn't think was due this week. I'm contemplating not going to that class tomorrow morning (hey, it's period 0, BEFORE school technically starts...)

But anyway, my IPT assessment was to create a multimedia system, and I chose to re make my schools current website, because for all of its faults, it was a fault in the first place. My site is not much better, because it's still incredibly boring, but at least my pages are consistent in layout and the links & navigation work.

I learned a bunch of new things which I can work into Dead Souls, cause uh, yeah... I'm going to re do the layout... Or at least, change the colours up a bit. I'm thinking... a more upbeat vibe. How does pastel pink and lime green feel? I really want to do the whole "Cute-goff" thing, as over done as it is.

But more so, it's sort of a tribute to a new-old character of mine. His name is Peter. I have drawn him many times, but I haven't had time/been able to upload the pictures. He might be familiar to some people though.

Uh, and I'll also upload some stuff soon, and add written character sheets, either here, dA, or DS.

I STILL HAVEN'T MANAGED TO HAVE MONEY ENOUGH OR TIME ENOUGH TO OUT AND PURCHASE BATTLE FOR THE SUN, AND IT UPSETS ME GREATLY. But on the plus side, I'm going to see Green Day in December (with my sister who is OSM), and I'm in the standing section. and I won some really neat goff boots from Ebay, which fit me like a wonder!

Toodles for now, lovelies.

X
B

Friday, June 12, 2009

Oh oh oh

Hello again everyone! I am still alive (stop sighing!)

Things have been... stressy. But not as much lately. I have finished a number of assessments and received my marks. The most noteworthy are that of English (in which I had to write a speech, and thusly, convinced myself that I had stuttered too much, and therefore 'failed') and Visual Arts (in which I really didn't have to do anything, other than give in my books for progress marking and such). Both went quite well. I was especially surprised when my English teacher told me that I got the highest mark in our class. It made me feel good about myself, seeing as earlier I had spilt black/grey paint all over my Yr 12 jersey.

I watched The Cabinet Of Doctor Caligari last week, and I have really fallen in love with Cesare, the sleepwalker. Don't worry, it's not in the whole teeny-'twilight' way, just that I've been going around on the internet calling myself the sleepwalker, and upon watching the film, finding out that Cesare is (or was) a sleepwalker too. (Just for the record, and those who are curious, I don't actually 'sleepwalk', in the normal sense. When I say it, I am generally referring to sleeping and dreaming... yeah. LAME OF ME, I KNOW.)
But, I totally dig him as a character. I think it's kind of attractive and intriguing. in a melancholy way, that he can only wake when Caligari tells him to & all that other stuff to do with... stuff... I really recommend this film, so I wont go into all of the story and that, just incase anyone wants to watch it or hasn't seen it.
I EVEN DREW FAN ART, BUT THATS NOT FOR HERE. I'm sure, I'll have it up within the next few days.

Speaking of dreams and all that, I've been having some real tripped out ones, mostly where I am me, but not really me, and I am being 'chased' (or kinda, followed?) by people and creatures and monsters. I decided to use them as a basis for the storybook part of my art major, SO TAKE THAT TRIPPY DREAMS. (But seriously, why do they villians of my dreams always try to eat me?)

But now I am tired, so I think I might go to sleep, or maybe pester my sister into watching Mirrormask (Gaiman/Mckean) because she borrowed it from her friend and showed me the other day, resulting in a reaction of mine which was somewhat like this.

Nighty Night, and Sweet Dreams!

B

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Style

I've just started following some more blogs, which seem, from what I skim-read, to be quite interesting and all that.

I was hoping to be a lot more active on DeadSouls, and while I've made a few more works to go up, I haven't had time/been able to scan them in or take photos. I have a whole bunch of assessments and school is slowly draining me.

But if I can get past the next two weeks alright, then I'll be fine. It annoys me that teachers think that only their subject is important (well, i'm lucky to have two really good teachers who aren't like that. they negotiate!) and therefore put their assessments and stuff on the same day as a million other things. I have 2 exams next week - a French listening exam, and a speaking exam. I also have two essays due, and the next week I have a speech and a visual arts progress mark.

I'm kind of looking forward to giving in my work so far, because I like to read feedback. Art, right now, (and kind of always), is my favourite subject. A day without art, is really tiring and boring for me. Even if art is the first class I have, I am still always happy for the rest of the day.
Thats why I'm excited for tomorrow, as my art class is doing practical work, and we're working on our majors... and I have a double-free (two study periods) right before it & before lunch. So, if I wanted to, and if whichever teacher held the room for those two periods would let me, I could really just work on painting my work for that whole time. It'd be glorious! I just started painting my work too... I'm very happy about it, because at the end of last year was when we all started working on our HSC artworks, and mostly everyone has done some form of painting (even if it was digitally), except for me. I first had to draw and plan my whole work (on a large scale) in pencil, and then once that was done (about 2 months ago now?) I had to ink it all. That took a little less time, but if it puts it into perspective, I only just started painting on the Monday that just passed. Finally, colour!

I had art theory today, and my teacher was talking about how she is an abstract painter. She was telling us how she likes other styles, but she will always prefer abstract. And then we were all discussing the first painting (etc) that got us into our current 'style', except I wasn't talking much, just listening. And I could see that her eyes kept falling on me, like she was secretly wanting me to join in and explain my style (because, just a note... my major is kind of based on dreams, false realities... that sort of thing. I've basically drawn a mish-mash of lots of the people/things I usually draw, the ones that started out in my dreams. So there are a lot of monsters with many arms, and the spider boys, and andro-boys and andro-girls in it) and all I could say was basically that when I was younger I was very heavily into video-games and comic book stories, and it progressed from there. I loved the fantastical. And then I started 'finding' people - artists - on the internet. But they weren't the famous artists in textbooks. They were just other people, like me. We all shared our art together. We influenced each other. That was all I could say. That I've met a lot of internet-famous and not-so-internet famous people on the world wide web, who helped me (even if they don't know it) to develop what I now call my style.
It was all very deep and epic when I said all this. It felt strange, letting people know so much about me. Even if its not very much. I think that a lot of people see me as a petite blonde faery-girl who sings strange songs (of cure and boosh) and draws constantly. I'm quite sure, that they just see that much, and think me a bit strange. But thats okay. Sometimes, I would like to tell everyone my 'secrets'. But...


I have a fear that everything would fall apart...

B.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Vanity breeds Obsession

There is something that has been bothering me more and more in the past few years, and I am beginning to believe that the reason it has been increasing in it's ability to bother me is because it is becoming more of a social standard and overall habit. A habit, which I severely hope that I am not doing myself, without realising it.

It, the habit, I believe has been growing in amount due to it becoming socially accepted. Every one is doing it. Every one has it. It has always been there, but I don't believe in such an amount.

Vanity.

Vanity and this thing that is people obsessed with image, the physical projection of oneself to the masses. And not only how the self looks, what their image is, but also the judging and constant evaluations of others.
This is not supposed to be another of my "Androgyny" rants. This has very little to do with it, depending on the perspective that you take (and I hope, you will take the same as me in this blog...)

It seems to me that it's perfectly fine and normal for people to be evaluated personality-wise on what they look like on the outside. It's the case of "Oh, well he/she dresses in such and such a way, he/she must be X, Y or Z." I know so many people who seem to live by this idea, and it's beginning to sicken me. I hate it.

In my previous blogs, I have spoken about my own appearance and they way in which I present myself to the world. I opt for the more androgynous because I feel comfortable that way. I hate wearing dresses if I don't have to (unless, on the odd occassion, I want to regardless), and I hate wearing super baggy clothing. Despite past 'image crisies' I am very comfortable with myself now. I like the way I look, and I know that I have others who disagree with it. I get comments all the time, and while sometimes they do upset me, I don't let them drag me down. In realising that that sort of stuff doesn't matter (that stuff being, pleasing everyone else), I've actually become a much happier person. All this, and I personally don't care how other people dress. It's their choice, and what do I have to do with that?

But this...Vanity and hatred, I have a problem with. I know people... People who I really don't believe are comfortable with themselves, despite how they act or how confident they may seem. I get this feeling because I see how they treat others. I don't how they treat others to their faces, but rather much like, what they say when others can't hear them. Generally, it always comes back to how the target LOOKS. There are always put downs. And it pains me. I'm tired, because I lied before when I said I don't try to please everyone - In these cases, I do. I don't say anything to the offenders. And I should. And in that sense I'm just as bad.

If any of the people I am actually writing about read this, of course, they wouldn't think it applied to them. That is the nature of these people. They're perfect, in their own vanity-obscured eyes.

I don't know. In all honesty. This blog is a bit all over the place, but I thought I ought to try and get some of what my headspace was thinking down.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Yesterday was my birthday, and now I am a scraggly little raggamuffin of 17 years. Oh, the youth I have.

Anyway, I spent the evening watching some of my birthday spoils, that is, I got The Mighty Boosh 1 & 2 DVD's. And that's what I've been doing this morning, and drawing some kind of bad (in my opinion) fan art of Vince and Howard (ie. i think it's bad because i can't make it look like them... save for the hair and mirrorball suit.)

And now for the list (which'll make me seem like a spoilt scraggamuffin --see what i did there?-- of 17 years):- The Mighty Boosh series One and Two on DVD
- Sleeping With Ghosts by Placebo
- Placebo by Placebo
- Black Market Music by Placebo
- Gaiman and Amano's The Dream Hunters (And I so fangirled over this!! The watercolours!!)
- Sandman volume 5: A Game of You
- Supersunnyspeedgraphic, the LP by Ben Folds
- The Myth Of Sisyphus by Camus
- A black button up with white polka dots on
- A Red and black check(ish) button up
- A Siouxsie shirt
- Two suspender belts (... because normal tights just aren't cool anymore...)
- And an Octagonal Box (???) (complete with engrish instructions? I love it!!!)

So that was all very cool and good. I also got some money with which to purchase things that I require or things that catch my eye and desire. I think I'll invest in some new t-shirts. And some goff bling.

I'm very happy to have gotten CD's. New music is always good for drawing and painting to. And I love especially Placebo's music. It has a certain ... vibe or sound (I'm not sure which, maybe both) which I can't describe in words without sounding a bit pretentious. So I draw it instead. (Just so you know, most of the shirtless boy drawings and paintings are from listening to Placebo, as well as the 'sleepy' ones... so that's kind of how I describe it with paintings.)

I'm going to leave it there because I'm finding it hard to type with a cat nuzzling my elbows.

B

Monday, April 27, 2009

A long abscence

It must seem as though I had forgotten DS.
It must seem as though I had stopped drawing.
It must seem as though I had lied about starting a web comic.

Two out of three are incorrect. The other is postponed, I think.
I haven't forgotten about Dead Souls. I have been checking back here, almost every couple of days, thinking to myself that I should write something. Check in and say hello. But every time I was over come with procrastination. This is usual for me.

Procrastination-prone, yes. But even with so, I have still been drawing. I have been filling Bruno (aka. My most recent 'new' sketchbook) up with many character sheet styled drawings, and many seemingly random lyrical inspired pieces. And then some which are just really quite odd.
I am planning on watercolouring them all, so that is probably why such a long amount of time has passed without anything being posted.

And now... the web comic. I haven't forgotten what I said in earlier blogs. I still want to write it. I still want to draw it. Actually, it's more like, I still want to draw it, I still would like to write it, but I can't be bothered doing either. Well, I can't be bothered writing script, and then, without script you can't really draw much can you? So that is a lot of procrastination. I have written some of the script - the prelude and the beginning of chapter one, but I am seriously considering re-writing it. It rushes. Very much.

But alas, I have word of a new and different comic. My sister , Siobhan (aka. Von), and I have been talking for what seems like months and months and months about writing/drawing a web comic together. It wasn't until quite recently that my sister re-found (as in, she had seen it last year in early may when we went to Mr. Neil Gaiman's book signing in Kinokuniya, SYD) this little book filled with lovely cute comic strips, called Delayed Replays, by Liz Prince. We realised that a) someone was basically living our life, or a life VERY similar to ours, and b) we could do this too.
We could write comics about the silly things that happen to us. We have done. We currently have five or so. And we will be putting them up on the internet very soon. (Well, as soon as Von makes the website all spiffy and nice...) Then you can read them and think we're weird, but then also show all of your friends, parents and even your cats.

I look forward to it!

B


EDIT: I almost forgot to mention, (and I can't understand how I forgot!) I drew and painted a page for a book in January of this year. A book that was thought up by a bunch of fangirly (but cool) fans of The Cure. It was a thank-you-and-happy-cure-anniversary book. It was planned that everyone/anyone could draw, write, paint or whatever a page for the book, write words of praise and thanks and congratulations to the band, and send it in to be put into the book. This was then to be given to the band at one of their concerts. It was. I am very excited about this.
And thank you to everyone who made a page, especially those who I convinced or told about it!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Today was the first day of my two week holidays. I am pleased.

I have had some very strange yet interesting dreams the past few nights, and while they are incredibly weird in their happenings, I still woke up with a feeling of loss because I had enjoyed dreaming them so much. That said, I am definately one of those people who feels like dreaming makes sleeping worth while.

I bought a new sketchbook, and named it Bruno. I have decided to start naming them human names, because I always get them mixed up. So, Bruno and I have been working together, and I've actually kept my word -- albeit, very late -- that I would do some character sheets. I have drawn... (quickly goes away to check) 9 so far. 9 and 1 painting. This is a good start. I would like to paint them, or at least give them a splash of colour before I scan them in.

My art class visited two of the locations for the Art Express yesterday, one of which being 'the Armory' in Homebush. I mention that one specifically, because we also went to the NSW Art Gallery, and I felt that the works there were less consistant in selection and overall theme (of the selection). In other words, I felt that as a collection of Yr 12 BOW's, the Armory's selection was much more... harmonious with one another. There was consistancy in concept. Most of which, being Imagination, Dreams, Death and the Anima & Animus. While I enjoyed looking at all of the works, and while I appreciated them, the fact that there were so many with similar conceptual backbone as mine made me kind of wary as to whether I will be selected next year (as pretentious as that sounds).

As for SW, I haven't started any of the artwork yet (other than the two title pages I had already mentioned -- but even those are not coloured in yet). And I'm thinking that I will re write what I have already in ways of the script. Everything seems to be... hurried.


I read that Placebo are going to be playing 3 shows in the UK before they start their 'summer' (winter over here!) tour, and that makes me kind of sad that I don't live in the UK. I hope very much that they come to AU, and that if that were to happen that I would also be able to get some tickets.

B